My new year's ritual
& reflections on two years of this newsletter
Hi friends,
I hope your holidays were restful and cozy and that you didn’t spend too much time on social media playing the comparison game. It’s so easy to do at this time of year; one picture of someone else’s family vacation can leave me convinced that everyone but me has a perfect life. It’s a recipe for a nasty emotional hangover, so I really try to limit my social media consumption between Christmas and New Year’s.
One thing I do love about this time of year is the opportunity it provides for collective reflection. I love to journal all year round, but New Year’s provides a natural inflection point for some deeper introspection. When I was drinking, New Year’s Eve was just another excuse to party. I promised myself that every year would be different – I would drink less, exercise more, be a better, shinier me – but I usually fell off the wagon by mid-January. The whole holiday season filled me with dread and anxiety and left me feeling drained.
I once heard someone say that how you spend your New Year’s is how you spend the year ahead, and it resonated with me. Regardless of my resolutions, my chaotic new year’s nights and hungover mornings bled into the year that followed. In sobriety, I began to shift my relationship with the first and last days of the year and created an intentional practice that felt nourishing. These days, my New Year’s Day ritual is not about making radical changes overnight; it’s a grounding opportunity to take inventory of where I’ve been and where I want to go.
If you’re interested in joining me, this is what my practice looks like. Every year I make two lists – you can write them longform or typed (I use the Notes app on my phone). The first is a list of everything I accomplished, prioritized, and worked on over the last twelve months. I write out places I’ve traveled to, moments I cherished, tiny wins, and obstacles I overcame. The list can be as long or short as you want. I like to listen to music and look back at photos while I write it to help jog my memory.
The second list is for goals and dreams – big and small, personal and professional – for the year ahead. This is the no holds barred, life is short, dream big list. I write out goals for every quadrant of my life: health, career, social, spiritual. But here’s the thing: there’s no pressure or timeline attached to any item. I just write them all down, letting myself admit that, yes, I want to do this, then detaching from the outcome. I’m a big believer in the power of putting our desires on paper and writing them into existence. Once I finish the list I don’t look back at it again until the following New Year’s.
It’s gratifying to look back at an old list and realize that I’ve accomplished things that felt like pie in the sky dreams when I first wrote them out. And those outstanding goals from the previous year? Not a big deal. They just get moved onto my new list if they still feel aligned. Sometimes it takes two, three, four years. Sometimes I look back at an old list and realize I’m not as attached to a goal anymore; it’s either evolved into a new one or taken on a different shape. Other times I revisit a list and feel invigorated and ready to recommit to an old dream that I couldn’t prioritize the year before. Last year I wrote: “get pregnant and have a baby.” A massive, life changing dream. It came true; other items on that list didn’t. And that’s okay! They’re coming with me into 2024 and beyond.
One of my goals going into 2022 was to create this newsletter. I had just submitted the final draft of my book, Drinking Games, to my editor and I was craving a space where I could write for fun and connect with readers in real time. I published my first post on January 4, 2022 and, two years later, I am so proud of the writing I’ve done, the conversations I’ve had, and the community that has blossomed here. I am so grateful for you, my readers, for coming on this journey with me week after week and for giving me the space to ease into my role as a new mom over these last three months. I have big things in store for us in 2024! Keep an eye out this week for news about the next chapter of Seltzer Rocks. ;)
What are you most proud of from 2023? What is your biggest, craziest dream for the year ahead? As always, my inbox is open.
Happy New Year!
Xx
Sarah